impossible is nothing

   it has been nearly two months since my last blog came out.i am not a lazy person,hmmmmmmmm,ok.maybe i am sometims.i have been rather busy lately.with tutoring,working,well,of course,spending time with u,my pig.ha

  pig is even much better than i expected,i know he is a bf material.so thanks to pigs parents,u gave me an amazing present!!!my exs told me that i am an amazing lover,actually i dont know how an amazing lover looks like,but my pig,i cant figure out another word to describe u.hehe,next Thur,its the day of our aniversary (haha,feel like we r married),i do think its a big day for us,well,this day used to be meaningful since its laotouzi's bday,but its significant now not so much his bday as our aniversary.maybe ppl will think i am a bitch that i fickle so quickly.but everyone should live for present rather than for the past.

  well,i still miss the guys in my world.james,jarron,laotouzi,zhoushijie and k.hopefully we could have chance to meet up again.well,zhoushijie,i am sure we r gonna meet again,because Oct is coming.Jarron?hmm,u told me maybe u would come over next year,so we will see.about others,i think its likely to have chance,as long as i am alive.LOL

  about my internship.its a great opportunity to learn sth,like what all the stuff do every single day,how a business funtions,what the subtle relationship r among coworkers.although i am tried,i was approved by my boss.this is the best reward,isnt it?i think i will miss the days when i was there.

  about the GMAT test,not much to say,because i have no time to take care of it…………i am regretful that i scheduled the appointment already.i wanna win,i hate being a loser.but this time.probably i am deemd to be a loser.Issue,argument,omg.i have no time to prepare,although laotouzi said he would help with GMAT,and i know he meant it,i still know he has no time to help me out even though he wanna do.well,anyway,i cant rest on others,that will make me less intelligent and more lazy.this is a fact i know since i was a little kid.

 1.5 months.can i make a miracle?if i will,gonna reward myself,like giving myself a trip?to jiuzhaigou?hahaha,hopefully with my pig(when i am angry,i can eat it,ham is good,LOL.and he can carry my luggages),carole,and Mike.haha,yes,double date,hmmm,more accurately,double trip!yeah!!!!!

 at the end,i am gonna make a confession.yes,i skipped classes today,not sth i supposed to do though.i got up late today.hate myself…………

sun villiage

its a orphanage located at the suburb of beijing.the "orphans" there r not real orphans.because their parents r in prison,so they have to go to the orphanage.all of them have different stories which i heard from my dutch friend Irene.she told me that some tragedies which occured to those kids.some kids' mothers killed their fathers,and then the mothers r behind the bar now.so the kids lost both of their parents.i cant imagine the life without any parent.their parents r never gonna released.i think this fact is more crucial than if their parents were dead.

 Irene told me that in Netherland,most adopted kids r chinese.well,more than 60%.i was really shocked by this figure.i asked her why.she told me that our government sends those orphans to Netherland,the US or other countries.Because we dont have the ability to take care of all the orphans.well,for the orphans,i think they r lucky.but for our country,this is patheic,isnt it?

  i wanna go to the sun villiage,compared with the kids there,i live as a princess.i have excellent parents who love me with their entire lives.its time to do sth for them.i mean it.i have been thinking of being a volunteer for such a long time.it will be a precious experience.i think after this experience,i can learn more about the society,and know how happy my life is.then i will know what i should do to maintain all of this.we should be grateful,shouldnt we?i always say the thankgiving day is the most meaningful western holiday i think.

 

about houhai

Irene interviewed me at houhai,asked me my opinion of the politics and economics in China.but this is not what i wanna say here.i wanna mention one dish i saw on the menu,su dongper's meat.when i saw it,i almost vomitted.OMG,i felt like i am a vampire or sth.fortunately,i am a chinese,i know what the ingredients r in this dish,otherwise i will never ever order this dish.i wanna see the facial experession of foreigners when u see this horrible name.haha.but this is not the most funny name.my friend told me that,there is a dish called"the chicken has no sexual life"OMG,rotf.this is ………………

houhai is one of my favourite places in bj.i dont know if it is uthat  make me think so.i like the lake there.peddling a boat on the lake is very romantic,really.i love this feeling.dont know if i will ever have a chance to peddle a boat there with my special one,Mr dreamy???LOL

 

about the internship

i did a survery with new oriental school staffs.under the hot sun,i walkd for hours.talked to different ppl.when i was off my duty,i felt exhausted.when i was sitting on the subway,i thought when i become a full time employer,how my life would be?i dont dare to think further.no one knows how it would be.

1. 2006你最开心的事是什么？

我长大了

2. 2006年最难过的事是什么？

奶奶去世了

3. 2007最大的心愿是什么？

赫赫，最大的心愿？最大？？？都是很大的心愿。所以，最大的心愿就是所有心愿成真。用会计学术语，那叫贴现

4. 这辈子最大的愿望？

我爱的人都幸福平安

5.如果现在可以让你随心所欲去旅行，你想去哪？

去哪儿？我想象阿。必须使旅行吗？现在最想去酒吧看看，不过不算旅行。那我还是去九寨沟巴。太远的不现实。

6.你最满意自己身体哪个部位？与别人初次见面你会先注意他（她）哪个部位？

睫毛~~~~~~很长的。整体感觉，反正身体比例要协调。不能上身长下身短…………

 

7.失眠过吗？你用什么办法对抗失眠？

失过。那就是姑奶奶我不睡了

8.会不会做饭？你希望你的伴侣（OR未来的伴侣）会做饭吗？

基本上不会。他必须要会——— 因为我很在意我的皮肤

9.你最想做哪个动画片角色？为什么？

机器猫………………

 

10.在你心中我是怎么样一个人？

怎么说呢，我觉得我们很像，而且我越来越觉得咱两很像。但是你比我有毅力。有节制。比如说在吃上

11.如果可以重来，你最想改变的是什么？

我大大一家人。他们太…………其它的我都很满意，我很容易知足哦

 

12.觉得自己是个自恋的人么?

有的时候觉得是，可是有的时候好像也挺自卑的

13.爱人爱到怎样的程度才算是超过爱自己呢？

我真的不知道，我想可能是，只要为了他，什么都可以不要把。

14. 你理想的伴侣应该具备什么样的品质？

成熟，真诚，有野心，智慧

15.谈谈你最近在听的音乐吧

Girlfriend哈哈，没想到和你一样把。我也爱死这首歌了。

16.你会出于什么样的理由结婚? 或者出于什么样的理由单身?

结婚？除非真正找到非他不嫁的人。单身阿？那就是没找到合适的，再有就是怕自己出轨………… 

17. 你是一个比较平稳的人还是可能作出一些出乎寻常举动的人？

应该是后者把，表面上曰平稳的人，其实内心才越波涛汹涌。

18. 你计划什么时候结婚？（可以给个时间段^_^）

恩，这个阿，我是我说的算阿。不过我自己觉得28岁比较合适

19. 想象一下，十年以后你最珍惜的事物可能会是什么，工作，家庭，朋友，闲暇，学习的机会？

十年后？？？OMG。那我就32了…………到那时候再说吧，谁知道呢

21.  你们相信自己可以改变一切吗？ 

不相信，实验过了。美成功啊

 

22.  你还生活在过去吗？

应该不是把，除了我还在怀念过去的身材…………

23.  爱情中最重要的是什么?

悟性~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

24.  道是何物？德又是何物？

道？？？我还真不知道，我知道道德是何物

25.  你对于永远的定义是什么？

我不相信永远，但是却觉得那是个美丽的谎言

26.  大四毕业之后你想干什么？最留念的人是谁？如果有同学会，你来吗？

你最欣赏我的哪点特质？最讨厌我的哪个方面？

干什么，应该从事管理或是金融方面的八。最留念的人？我爱的人都在我身边，所以谈不上留念。同学会？不知道，要看当天心情。

28.  06年度你心中最欣赏的人是谁？

laotouzi

29.  你最想定居的地方？

北京

31.  你觉得自己是偏理智还是偏感性？ 

理性

32.  2008年有什么打算？

看奥运会，好好谈恋爱，好好挣钱。

33.  你觉得自己最大的缺点是什么？

缺点很多，身材阿，学业阿，有的时候不够勇敢，有的时候太顺从！！！通常顺从是对在乎的人还是不在乎的人？？？

  昨天是儿童节，本打算给自己买个棒棒糖，但是哪里也没有去。回到家，暴饮暴食的毛病又犯了，吃了多少东西我就不说了，怕吓着人…………唉，看着自己发福的身材，真是愁啊…………我怎么就这么爱吃呢？怎么就这么懒呢？？？！！！所以我告诉阳，今天一定要发短信给我，督促我健身！！！！！！！！不能把健身卡当澡卡用。话说回来，还真有一天做梦，梦到自己去健身房洗了个澡就回来了……汗。

  前几天一直失眠，再加上有一天气压低，感觉自己像死了一样。很早就上床睡了，有时候真的希望自己永远不要起来，就这么睡过去算了。

  昨天试了试哥给我的麦，激动之余，就在msn上，用这个小骂了阳一下，觉得效果还不错！！！！！只不过，最近也不知怎么了，网络特别不好，上3个小时，得自己断个，7，8回，就说便宜没好货，为什么便宜？总得有他的理由把。前几天就打过电话了，说什么48小时内就会有回馈……那都是骗人的，已经4个48小时了，依然杳无音信。爱，习惯了，没买之前，你就是爷，买了之后，你就是小孙孙了…………不行，我决定，就是现在，在无情的骚扰维修站。经斗争进行到底！！！！！！！！ 

yesterday was children's day.very quite,well,after all.its not my day or ppl suppose that its not my day.i intent to buy myself a lollippop,but i went no where.hehe,retrospected my childhood,it was not as wonderful as that of others.i am not passive,its the truth,not a grievance.but i dont care about what happened in the past,ppl should always move on otherwise,he or she is quite pathetic.because only if u r not satisfied with ur present,u will talk about ur past all the time.

   i suffered from insomnia for 5 days,i dont know the exact reason.i guess its sth to do with the further education thing.Uncle Zhou suggested me go abroad right after my graduation.Can i?i think its too late to apply for a master or plan for this whole "blueprint" now.the whole process(i mean taking test,collecting all my files,finding apprpperiate recommenders) could take forever.and probably i must prepare for GRE test from the very beginning.OMG.who can save me?

and i dont know whether my parent can accept the decison if i will ever make.what should i do?well,i can understand Zhou's consideration.if i cant gain outstanding work experience,going tp top 20 business school will be a dream of me.and most horrible thing is i dont have any confidence on getting a good job after graduation.be or not to be?it is a though question,isnt it?

  look at the pic attached with this blog.this is the book i am working on.so thick,huh?can u imagine how heavy it is?hahahaha.

 

   刚才问了地主一个问题，有喜欢的人是不是一件幸福的事。因为觉得自己很可悲，好像到现在为止也没特别喜欢过谁。本来觉得应该会想一个人，但发现我并没有。刚刚和他说话，很平静，就好像陌生人。甚至我和他说话的语气很冷很冷。突然间觉得自己很可怕，怎么可以这么快就忘掉一个人？记得在高中的时候就羡慕过哼哼，因为她总能找到喜欢的人，而我，似乎确这根神经，即便有，也是有他没他无所谓的那种…………我是不是基因有缺陷啊？？？？…………或许是我太理智，或计较得失，就像投资一样，如果觉得入不敷出，绝不会尝试？？天哪，我该怎么办啊…………

   我想可能是我自己闲来无事，瞎想把。内心空虚的人就是我这样，如果多点正经事做可能就好了。

   刚刚james发了照片给我，他纹身了。其实我挺喜欢纹身的，但自己不会去弄。如果我弄，会选择蝴蝶的图案。纹在肩上或是腰上（那个，先得把腰整出来，需要时间啊），我觉得看起来很性感。纹身适合比较瘦的女孩，起码我这么想。爱，所以阿，我是无缘了。这几天还琢磨，怎么胖成这个样子了？？？减肥道路任重而道远。不过我是觉得我这人没毅力，太禁不住诱惑，也太懒。

  那天去动物园踩点，其实是摸摸行情，恩，拿衣服还都是那么受，于是暗示自己，一定要减肥，不言衣服怎么穿。鹿鹿说，买瘦得好看的衣服挂墙上，我太了解自己了，我说，没用，我要是懒，什么动力都没用…………果然让我严重。爱，不争气啊。还有，我妈也总是助纣为虐，总买零食，和他说了我不吃，还有买，名曰，我吃啊，你不会不吃啊。怎么可能啊，太不了解我了，每回都是还没等她吃上一口呢，就被我报销了。因此，我总结，你要把吃的防盗我看不见的地方。可是阿，我妈太笨了，每回都被我找到…………没奈了。问题：为什么在这种事上，我总这么有才呢？

 最近背的事很多，但是不想提了。高兴的事也很多，认识了一个很牛的人，相信能和他学到很多东西。GMAT水平有所突破。上一个学生这次GMAT分数比商会高了190分。虽然胖了，但是去年夏天的衣服还能塞进去。不过效果…………我终于平静下来了，和哼的关系也走上了正轨。阳在学校的ERP选拔赛中的了第一，10号要去上海参加决赛。妈妈的基金赚了。哈哈，越说我越高兴。不写了，我没事偷着乐去了

 

 i dont know why i feel so bored tonight.not willing to talk with most ppl.today is a busy day for me.tutored a student this morning,afterwards went to gym ,finally visited my grandparents.damn tired,but cant fall asleep,so the only thing i can do to kill time is surfing the net.connection sucks recently which makes it hard to log in msn.but i succeeded tonight and met u online.the feeling is really weird.felt that u r unfamiliar to me,just like a stranger.at the very moment,i thought i was so pathetic.because my passion towards someone seems never lasting.

 i think to love is a happiness.its a part of life.but i am sort of unable to do so.no wonder a friend joked "u r a cold bitch",to some extent .yeah,i am.but i dont think i am a player.so why?why cant i be serious?is it because the right one havent appeared yet or i born with less emotion compared with others?i am confused.who can give me an answer?

   i always think too much when i am free,guess the best way to get rid of depression is busting my ass.but the case is my life is quite boring.given 7-days holiday,i should be happy and go travelling,but as i said before,i am just like a bird in the cage,no freedom. trip,no way!!what i can and must do is working on my essay,tutoring my students,visiting relatives which i am doing all the time.is there any chance that i can make a change or just take a break?well,life is a struggle.i understand this saying completely.well,i dont wanna whine more.its boring to do so.and makes no sense.well,i am sure i will be fine tomorrow.